4 STEPS TO STOP FEELING LIKE A FAILURE

Your path in life is rarely easy, with obstacles and challenges showing up along the way. However, always remember: success often comes after learning from failure.


BY: KATIE HAKE RDN, CD

If you’re like most people, life hasn’t come easy. From family to work, there are the inevitable struggles and challenges that can make you feel like you’re failing in life.

When something you’ve dedicated time and resources doesn’t come to fruition, you feel that pit in your stomach and are ready to ugly cry. You feel defeated, and start questioning your path and choices. And those feelings are amplified even more as you decide to scroll through social media. You ask yourself: “Why does everyone else but you seem to be making it in life?”

Here’s the thing: the only thing you’re seeing is the highlight reel.

We may not see all the failures and the “no’s” that others encounter to get to where they are, so comparing yourself is doing nothing to help you move forward. Your reality of failure is often someone else’s reality too, even if you don’t see it for yourself.

No matter how you look at it, the feeling of failing feels the same for everyone. And it always sucks.  

So what do you do when you fall so hard, and so short of your own goals? What do you do to pick yourself back up and not throw in the towel?

1. Set a timer on your sorrow.

Give yourself permission to go in your room, put your phone on airplane mode, and legit cry yourself to sleep. Ask yourself, do you need a few days or a week to full decompress from the situation and not think about it? Whatever that time limit, honor it and fill your extra time with self-care that helps you feel like yourself again.

2. Create a new game plan.

Obviously, whatever you were doing wasn’t working, so take the time to reassess how you can take a different approach. Find new resources, or reach out for help from those who have been successful. It’s time to check your ego at the door, and lean on those who can help pull you out of this slump

3. Lean in.

You are a positive person, but in this moment, you have a pretty negative loop speaking in your head. Find someone who can be your cheerleader in this time. Swallow your stubborn pride, and ask those around you directly for the kind of support you need.

4. Rewrite the story in your head.

You need to have a serious conversation with that little voice that says you ‘can’t’. Keep reminding yourself, ‘this is my purpose, I was meant for this’ when those thoughts turn to doubt. Write on sticky notes and post reminders around your house, if you need it. Focus on repeating positive affirmations to keep you motivated on the days you feel overwhelmed. When you do this, you’re much more equipped to look back and reflect on your learned experiences. Recognize that all that you have done to get to this very point wasn’t in vain, because you’re further along than you had been before you started trying.

You see, failures teach us that everything worthwhile in life never comes easy. But if it is important to you, stay persistent and keep pushing because you will find a way.

Believe you were meant for more, and do not settle for anything less.

Adapted from the original article.

Katie Hake, RDN, CD is an Indiana-based Registered Dietitian, national fitness presenter, and owner of Katie Hake Health & Fitness. It is her mission to empower women to overcome their need to measure success by the numbers and find their fierce. For more tips on finding your fierce, visit www.katiehake.com